What I Wanted
by teal'c08
Summary: Set at the end of Opposite Date when Jade storms in to the waiting room. what if things got a bit more intense than they did in the episode? what if jade wasn't so cool? What if she told Beck exactly how much he failed her.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This has been floating around in my head since _Opposite Date_ aired. The characters are terribly OOC, but I nevertheless felt the need to type this up and post it. Call me a glutton for punishment. It's going to be mostly dialogue.

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"Jade, you have no right to be mad at us-" Tori started to say with a slightly guilty look on her face. Jade opened her mouth to say something, but Beck cut her off.

"Yeah, I mean you wanted this."

Jade had been looking surprisingly meek, despite her all black outfit and bright green highlights, but at her ex-boyfriend's words, her eyes flashed and lit up with the fire of barely contained rage.

"I wanted this?!" She asked in a sharp, almost strained, tone. "What exactly did I want Beck" she spat with venom in her voice.

"You broke up with me" Beck said in a flat voice, as if he wasn't reminding her of one of the most painful memories in her life.

"You think I wanted this? You really think I wanted to throw away a _three and a half year relationship_ in _**10 seconds!**_" She desperately tried to keep the hurt out of her voice, but it was getting increasingly more difficult to do.

"Then what did you want, Jade?" There was still very little emotion in Beck's voice, but Jade thought that maybe she detected _something_ there. Something to tell her that he still cared, if only a little.

"_**I wanted you to FIGHT for me, Beck!" **_Jade all but screamed, her fierce personality finally coming through. From the corners of her eyes, she saw everyone in the waiting room lean back in their chairs, trying to put more distance between themselves and the scary girl. Even Tori took a few steps back so she wasn't directly in the line of fire.

Beck, on the other hand, just looked like he was alternating between shocked and confused.

"I was so tired of being the only one defending us. I wanted _you_ to do it for once." She let out a bitter chuckle. "I wanted you not to shout that you were unhappy with our relationship in front of a studio audience. I wanted you not to offer up your car when I said I wanted to slam my head in a door." At that, Beck had the decency to look embarrassed. He could hear the people in the waiting room whispering around them ("_Did he really do that?", "That was pretty cold, man.", "No wonder she broke up with him.") _but wisely chose not to respond.

Jade continued, however, undeterred by the peanut gallery. She had some things she had wanted to say for months now, and she was finally going to get them out.

"I wanted you to defend me, Beck, not laugh when our teacher, _our friends_ called me a gank, or make jokes about being 'splitsville.' I wanted you to realize that maybe you should tell girls that you had a girlfriend instead of letting them flirt with you and that perhaps texting another girl 10 times before noon was not the most appropriated thing." Beck stared at her, unable to formulate a response. He wasn't like Jade; he had trouble formulating responses without a script in front of him.

Jade stared back at him, eyes glassy with unshed tears as she brought up the one event to which all of their problems could be traced. "I wanted you not to kiss Tori because you thought that I needed to be punished and that hurting me, cutting me, so deeply was the best way to do it." She said, choking down the tears that threatened to come out. She **was not** going to cry in the waiting room of Petmergency."And I wanted the rest of the class not to applaud when you did."

She looked down then, unable to look her ex-boyfriend in the eyes anymore."I wanted to walk out that door knowing that you were going to be right behind me because, no matter what, we were always by each other's side. _On_ each other's side."

Jade rolled her eyes upwards as she let out another bitter laugh. "I _didn't _want to be proven so incredibly wrong about that."

Suddenly angry as one more painful memory came to mind, she looked up. Her blue-green eyes locked directly on his brown ones, glaring right at him as fire danced within them

"And I _**really**_ didn't want to watch you call me a horrible person because you wanted to convince Tori to kiss you _**three weeks**_ after we broke up." Beck and Tori's mouths opened in shock, never mind the rest of the waiting room.

"Yeah, I would have thought that you had learned to make sure that the web cam is off before you make out with a girl" Jade said with a sneer, alluding to a somewhat embarrassing event while they were together when Beck's Canadian family saw much more of Jade then they ever needed to see.

"But that's not the point. The point is that _you _shouldn't bring up what _I_ wanted because _**clearly **_that has not been a concern of yours for a while." With that, Jade turned to walk out of the glass doors.

As she reached down to push them open, she paused and turned back to Beck. "By the way, I was going to say that I wasn't mad that you and Tori were out together because we should all be able to hang out with whomever we want. I mean, we're all friends, right." She said with a sarcastic little smirk which did nothing to cover up how much it pained her to say those words.

Beck looked down, unable to meet the eyes of the girl he had clearly hurt so badly.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. I'll be in the car, Cat. See you guys Monday." With that, she turned, her black and green hair bouncing behind her as she stormed out.

A/N: That's all for now. I have an idea for a second chapter, and maybe even a third, but I'm not sure when, if ever, I'll get them out.  
Sorry this is so bad. I can clearly see the way that it plays out in my head, their expressions and actions, but I can't seem to write (type) it that way without doing a sort of script format which I've never been comfortable with.


	2. On the hood of a car

A/N: Hope everyone had a good New Year. Thank you to all who reviewed. Your kind words really pushed me to write this next chapter (plus it was really great to see reviews from some of my favorite authors). This chapter takes place immediately after the end of the first one. I spent a lot of time talking about the pilot kiss, because that always really bothered me. Hope you enjoy

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Beck was silently stared at the door through which Jade had just stormed, too shocked to say anything. However, the people in the waiting room were not as tongue tied.

"Told you she was scared."

"She just wanted you to make her feel safe."

"You really thought it was a good idea to go on a date with Tori after everything that happened?"

"_**We're not on a date!"**_ Tori exclaimed. Beck still remained silent, not knowing how to respond to the all the comments.

"Seems to me that you've wanted to date Beck for a while now. " The older woman said with a mildly disapproving tone.

"I don't want to date Beck! We are not dating! This is an _Opposite Date!" _Tori cried.

"Mmm Hmmm"

Tori was about respond when the nurse came in to give Beck the ointment for his aunt's dog.

"Oh, hi Cat."

"Hi Maureen!"

"How's your brother's turtle?"

"Not that great." Cat said with a sad look on her face.

"What's wrong with your brother's turtle?" Tori asked, eager to shift the focus off of the love triangle that had inadvertently formed.

"Well…" While Cat distracted everyone with the turtle's problems, Beck slid his way out the front doors. He quickly scanned the parking lot, searching for the all too familiar form of his ex-girlfriend sitting on the hood of her car.

"Hey," he whispered as he walked closer to her. She turned to him and raised one eyebrow, clearly unimpressed.

Beck cleared his throat and shoved his hands in his pockets. '"So…that was interesting. And uh…enlightening?"

Jade rolled her eyes and groaned in exasperation. "What do you want, Beck? I would have thought that you were all talked out. 5 words is a lot for you."

Beck winced. "Okay, I may have deserved that-"

Jade scoffed _"Might have?"_ she muttered under her breath.

"_But,_" Beck pressed on, "I really did want to make sure that you're okay and to talk about what happened.

"What happened was that you finally got what you've been after since the first day Vega walked into Sikowitz's classroom and I got to tell you exactly how shitty you could be as a boyfriend." She shrugged "Seems to me like everything is pretty well wrapped up. What is there to talk about?" Jade said as leaned back against the windshield of her car and closed her eyes, willing Beck to leave.

"Ugh! God Jade! How many times do I have to tell you that I don't want Tori!" Beck grabbed his hair in frustration, nearly pulling out the strands.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me. Not anymore."

Beck sighed and climbed onto the hood to recline next to Jade. The two sat in silence for a few minutes, Jade because she had nothing left to say and Beck because he _didn't know_ what to say.

"Do you really still think about that kiss with Tori?"

Jade's eyes popped open and she turned her head to look at her ex-boyfriend, shocked that he had brought up such a difficult topic.

"It felt you had stabbed me in the heart, Beck. That kind of pain just doesn't go away so quickly. Plus it was the first time I ever really doubted our relationship." She whispered, deciding that since he was finally trying, she could rein in her sarcastic streak for the moment.

"I don't get it. You've never had an issue with stage kisses before." And that was true. For all her jealousy issues, even Jade realized that if they were going to be actors, they would have to kiss in scenes.

"But it wasn't simply a stage kiss! It was improv. You could have said 'no', but you decided not to. You knew it would hurt me, but you didn't care." Beck opened his mouth to protest, but Jade shook her head at continued before he could speak.

"When was the last time one of us kissed someone during an improve scene?" She asked. Beck thought about it and realized that it was true. It was like an unspoken agreement between them that they wouldn't kiss someone else if they had the choice not to. And he broke that.

"First you asked if she could sleep in our bed, which was bad enough, but I was willing to let that go because you were trying to be funny, which hardly ever turns out well for you," Jade starts, seeing that Beck was finally starting to see the truth in her words. "But then you kiss her? You kiss her knowing what it would do to me, knowing that it would hurt me because you thought I needed to be punished? It was horrible. And the fact that you said nothing while everyone cheered for the two of you made it that much worse."

Sometime while Jade was talking, Beck closed his eyes in shame, once again unable to look into his ex's eyes and see the pain that he caused shinning in them. When she stopped talking, he opened his eyes to see that she had turned her head away and was staring off into the distance, a trick he knew she used when she wanted to stop her tears from falling.

"Hey," he called softly. When she didn't respond, he reached out and gently turned her head towards his. "You have to know that I didn't lie when I said I don't have feelings for Tori. I made a bad call with the improv kiss and the one before the PMA's? Well I think that was me reaching out for something that wasn't there because I was upset and lonely. I kept hearing that Tori and I would make a good couple, and I guess got it in my head that they were true. "

Jade tried to turn her head away again, but Beck held it steady. "But they were _wrong_. Tori and I will never be anything but friends, I promise. I'm so sorry that I hurt you, Jade. I love you so much, the last thing I would every want to do is cause you pain."

Jade smiled slightly and nodded her head. "I love you, too."

Neither one mentioned the fact that they had both used the present tense, not the past.

"So where do we go from here?" he asked.

"We don't go anywhere, Beck. We stay friends and we hang out and goof off. I try to let go off all of the little times you weren't necessarily the best boyfriend, you try to do the same for me, and we remember that, all in all, we had a pretty good run."

"Hey guys. You ready to go?" Beck and Jade jumped at bit at the loud intrusion into what had been their own quiet, little world and broke their staring match to look over at Cat and Tori who had just walked over with Beck's aunt's dog.

Jade was the first to find her voice again and gracefully slid off the hood. "Yeah. Get in the car, Cat." She said as she opened the driver's side door and got in.

Beck stood back and watched as she pulled out of the parking lot while Cat hung her head out of the car window with her tongue sticking out.

After a few minutes, he turned to Tori and nodded over to his car. She followed silently, but it was obvious that she was holding herself back from inundating him with questions.

"Later, Tori." He said. She nodded and the two (three with the dog) got into the car to drive home to end their 'un-date.'

()()()()

A/N: so that was a little bit longer. I'm going to try to keep writing this, but I can't promise that the updates will be particularly regular. Hopefully you will all stick with me.

Until next time!


	3. The Janitor's closet

A/N: I'm so sorry that I haven't updated in months. School and family issues have sort of been kicking my butt lately and then when I finally had time to sit down and write my computer broke. I say that I've written and re-written this chapter by hand at least three times on my train home, it's not an exaggeration, but I'm still not thrilled with it. This final version is being written at 3 o'clock in the morning, is unbeta'ed, and may or may not be read over once before posting, depending on how sleep deprived I am when it's over.

"We need to talk."

"I'm a bit busy right now, but if you come back later I'll be sure to squeeze you in." The dark-haired girl replied as she continued to put her books away in her locker, not even pausing to spare the boy a glance.

"Now, Jade." The usually stoic boy's voce was surprisingly tense as he grabbed her arm and dragged her into the janitor's closet, closing the door behind them.

"Why Beck! Whatever can I do for you?" Jade asked in her faux Southern drawl while she perched herself on the tool chest in the back of the room.

"Cut it out, Jade. You know exactly what this is about."

"I'm not a mind reader, dude, so could you just tell me what it is that has your underwear in a bunch? Because I actually do have things I need to get done."

"You kissed Moose!" Beck all but shouted.

"And you tried to kiss Tori. Thank you for this lovely trip down post-break up memory lane, but if that's all I really must be going now." Jade responded her tone even as she hopped off the chest and made her way to the door.

"Hey" Jade hesitated, but didn't turn around.

"Sit."

Something in his tone made her listen to him, although she couldn't help but throw out an _"I'm sitting because I want to."_ as she resumed her perch and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Could we dial the snark back a bit, Jade? I get it, you're witty and quicker than I'll ever be and if I step out of line, I'll walk out of here wearing my testicles as a hat. Did I cover it all?" Jade looked away from him and remained silent, which Beck took as acceptance. He let a long breath of air and attempted to make eye contact with her.

"Why did you kiss him?" his voice was soft, quiet "How could you kiss him?" vulnerable.

"Why do you care so much?"

"You know why"

"Do I?" she asked while looking him straight in the eyes, almost challenging him.

"You know you do" His gaze was unwavering, daring her to say he's wrong.

The two were silent, eyes locked, before Jade looked away and mumbled something under her breath.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Beck asked, a knowing smirk curving on the edge of his lips.

Jade's eyes narrowed. "You heard me."

"No, no, I don't believe I did. Would you mind repeating that for me?" He asked.

"Fine! I said 'I'm sorry, okay!' I guess I got so caught up in the competition and beating Cat and Tori that I didn't stop to consider how it would affect you so I _apologize_." Jade said, spitting out the last word as if it left a bad taste in her mouth. "Now don't let it get to your head there, Beck; your ego can't afford to get much bigger." She added when she saw the full blown grin on his face.

"Isn't that a bit like the pot calling the kettle black there, Jade?"

"You're such an ass." She huffed, although there was no real malice behind her words.

"And we were having such a pleasant conversation!"

After a few seconds of silence, Jade pouted slightly and crossed her arms over her chest. ""Besides, a like black." She murmured.

Beck took one look at her and could no longer hold in his laughter, Jade joining in soon after.

"G-d I missed this." He said once they had quieted down. "Didn't you miss this?"

"What? Fighting in a janitor's closet? No, can't say that I did."

"Jade-"

"I know, I know, not what you meant. And yeah, I did miss it. We haven't laughed like this in a while- too long really. And I really am sorry about the whole Moose thing. Seeing you and Tori sucked, but I can't imagine that hearing about Moose and me was much better."

"This jealousy thing is horrible. I mean I feel so drained. Were you always this exhausted?"

"Now you know why I've always been so addicted to coffee." Jade replied with a smirk.

"Hey, do you have your scissors on you?" He asked.

"Um, no, Captain Random, I don't. If I did, you would have known as soon as you none-too-gently dragged me into this fine meeting room here. That testicles as a hat thing probably isn't as much of a hyperbole as you thought it was. Why do you ask?"

"I never thought it was hyperbole. Anyway, I want to ask you something but I was trying to ensure that there was no chance of bodily harm before I did." Beck responded, subconsciously crossing his legs.

"Please," Jade said, rolling her eyes, "I can think of 47 ways to maim you using the contents of that shelf alone."

"But there's nothing but toilet paper and paperclips on that shelf"

"Exactly." Jade's tone was more than slightly menacing as she regarded him with one brow raised and a gleam in her eye.

"Okay then?" Beck said, his voice trembling just a bit.

When she noticed him shifting on his seat, Jade rolled her eyes. "But I suppose I promise to do no bodily harm." She said and Beck released a breath he had been holding.

"Why did Tori get so under your skin?" He asked.

"You really want to open that can of worms, Beck? We've already talked about that." At his nod, Jade let out a long sigh and brought her knees up to her chest. "Okay, but you can't interrupt. Remember 47 ways."

"But you promised no bodily har-"

Jade's eye narrowed. "47 ways." She growled and Beck raised his hands in surrender.

"It was never about Tori, not really anyway. And yeah, I've said that all of our problems can be traced back to your first kiss with her, but if I'm being honest with myself, I know that that started way before she got here. For whatever reason, because I _will not_ fall into the 'mean girl with daddy-issues' stereotype," Beck had to smile at her fierce disdain for cliché that she had always adamantly opposed, "I was terrified of losing you to someone better. And most of the time when you talked to other girls I could find something better about myself- If they were pretty, I at least I'm more talented; If they were smart, well let's face it, I was always smarter- and so I was content to just chase them away with a well-placed glare."

"So why was Tori different" Jade's eyes flashed to his, her ire obvious in her ice-blue orbs.

"I know! '47 ways.' I'm sorry, please continue."

Jade glared at him for a moment. "Anyway," she ground out, "with Tori, all of a sudden, I couldn't find something wrong with her. Clearly she's attractive if you go for that sort of thing, she was getting all the leading parts, parts I ordinarily would have gotten, and, loathe as I am to admit it, she's actually pretty smart. And you were into her."

Beck opened his mouth to contradict her, but she held up her hand to stop him. "No talking! Besides, are you really in any position to deny it given recent events?" Beck closed his mouth, realizing that he didn't have a leg to stand on.

"So I was extra mean to drive her even farther away. But it backfired, because all it did was push you away from me. I just couldn't see at the time that the tighter I tried to hold on, the more distant you became."

Beck once again opened his mouth to speak, but stopped when he remembered her conditions. Jade just stared at him for a bit, enjoying the feeling of having such control, before she finally relented and told him that he could speak.

"That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!" He exclaimed while running his hands through his long hair. Jade's expression turned dark, but Beck beat her to it before she could had the chance to speak. "No, now it's my turn. I would have never done anything with those other girls! The reason I could talk to them without considering it flirting was because the thought never even occurred to me. They were so insignificant in my mind and I couldn't fathom how you could be jealous when I almost felt sorry for them. When I was with you, Jade, you shined so bright that I couldn't even see anyone else, in any respect."

"Wow, cheesy much?" Jade asked, her harsh words belying her true emotions evident in her glistening eyes and small smile.

"My turn, Jade."

"Oh, I love it when you get rough, Beck."

The tan boy, unable to formulate a response, simply shook his head and continued on. "And yeah, Tori was different. Something about her intrigued me. But that doesn't mean that I thought she was better than you! I meant what I said the other day outside the vet office."

Jade uncurled is body and turned so that she could rest her hand on his arm. "I know you did, Beck, but you asked how I felt and I told you. As I said, it was never really about Tori, she just brought many of my own issues to the surface and I resented her for it. I never really doubted your loyalty. You just don't have it in you to be _that _bad of a person."

Beck looked at her hand on his arm and laughed, marveling at the fact that she could make something that should be a compliment sound like an insult.

"Look, I don't want to let jealousy ruin our friendship like I let it ruin our relationship." She continued.

"I don't want that either."

"So it's decided then. We're done with jealousy. We can each date whomever we want to date and the other will be supportive." She declared while extending her hand for a shake. Beck grasped her hand in a firm hold but then pulled it slightly towards him.

"But no kissing Moose."

"And no kissing Tori." She answered, pulling their clasped hands towards herself.

"Then no Andre." He replied while continuing their little game of tug-o-war.

"Andre?"

"He's had a crush on you for a while now. Since you guys worked on that song together, I think."

"Really? Hmm…"

"Jade!" Beck exclaimed, shocked that she seemed to be considering their friend.

"What? He's not bad looking."

"Jade…" He practically growled.

"I'm kidding!" She laughed, her eyes lighting up with mirth. "No Moose, no Tori, and no Andre."

"Agreed." They said at the same time, sealing the agreement with one final pump of their hands.

Beck got up and made his way to the door but stopped when he realized that Jade was not following him out. Turning around, he noticed her climbing up the shelves and trying to open the cover of the air vent.

"Whatchya doing?" He asked in a sing-song voice.

Once again, she spoke without turning to face him, completely focused on her task. "If we both leave this room together after being in here for this long, people are going to talk and I for one would like to avoid that. Aha!" she exclaimed when she finally managed to get the grate open.

Beck watched with a bemused expression on his face as she pulled herself through the opening and into the vents when something occurred to him.

"Hey, you never said anything about Cat!" he called to her just as she disappeared through the hole in the ceiling. Jade's face reappeared as she poked just her head back through. "You didn't say anything about Robbie." She countered.

"Please, Robbie wouldn't survive one day with you."

"Yeah, well, _you _wouldn't survive one day with Cat." And with that Jade pulled her head back in and closed the lid behind her, vanishing from Beck's view.

As he turned to leave through the door (_like a normal person, _he couldn't help but think), he could only laugh and shake his head at the truth of her statement.

A/N : okay, so I would like to say that this isn't the end, but realistically, it is. I tried to write it so that Tori Saves Beck and Jade seems like a logically progression, so hopefully that came across.

Thank you for all of the kind reviews and constructive criticisms. They really meant a lot to me.


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